


Shopping Shenanigans

by fanatic564



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: au where thomas doesn't have hello fresh and so he must go grocery shopping like a normal person, let me know if im missing any tags, some blood/gore, typical remus behaviors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:02:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21682654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanatic564/pseuds/fanatic564
Summary: Thomas just wants to go shopping like a normal person.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 52





	Shopping Shenanigans

**Author's Note:**

> Its been almost a year since I last posted a fic. I actually wrote this about a week after DWIT, and it sat collecting dust. I said frig it and decided to post it with little to no changes. I hope yall enjoy this garbage.

Grocery shopping is usually a normal experience for Thomas. Well, as normal as it can be when four different people are talking at once about his shopping choices. Four people that no one else can see.

The five had formed a sort of routine. Thomas would hold his phone to his ear in an attempt to seem like a normal person talking on the phone about what to buy. Logan would lecture Thomas about the importance of good eating, and what they do and don’t have the money for. Patton would beg for Thomas to buy some sweets, or anything that has a cute mascot (Logan usually shoots most of his ideas down, as they do not need all of those items. He may, every once in a while, let it slide though, and allow Thomas to get a single dessert item). Roman usually just teams up with Patton in trying to get Thomas to buy things they definitely don’t need. And Virgil just worries the whole time, hoping they have enough money for everything, especially when Logan finally caves with the other two sides. 

This is their routine. This is normal. But now, there is a new factor in play, messing up their routine.

"What if you just bought everything in the store, right now? Ooh, better yet, how about if you just stole everything?”

Ever since he had made an appearance, Remus has been nothing but a thorn in Thomas’s side, showing up where he shouldn’t and giving suggestions that Thomas would never go through with. Right now, he was sprawled across Thomas’s shopping cart in a position that, if he were corporeal, would be both uncomfortable, and probably impossible. Thomas tries his hardest to look past him and keep shopping, not letting the thoughts get to him. However this doesn’t deter The Duke.

"How about we take all of the Roman-lettuce and burn it all, every piece? I bet everyone would be better off without it."

"Bro, could you shut your mouth for like, a second?"

"Oh, you mean like this?" Before anyone could reply, Remus snaps his fingers, and his mouth is sewn shut with a bright green piece of thread. Blood drips down from the little holes the thread made in his skin. Thomas flinches, shutting his eyes tightly. 

"Did not need to see that." He whispers to himself. He opens his eyes and continues looking at vegetables at Logan's suggestion.

At the edge of his vision, Thomas sees Remus snap again and his face goes back to normal. He breathes a quiet sigh of relief and moves onto the next vegetable. Its quiet for a while, and Thomas doesn't check to see if Remus is still there or not, having learned his lesson last time. It's almost too quiet...

"What if you just took this eggplant and shoved it up your bu..."

"Please stop!"

The couple next Thomas gives him a confused glance. He gestures weakly to his phone, and they shrug, before moving on.

Maybe Thomas's life will never be considered normal in the eyes of others. But in time, this too will become normal to him.


End file.
